How To Help an Unemployed Friend

Helping others in their job search.


After having spent a long time out of work and looking for a great job, I have heard all sorts of advice from well-meaning friends. I know that they were just trying to be helpful, but the constant questions made me feel bad about myself and my job search. Before long, I began avoiding social situations because I felt as though this aspect of my life was constantly being graded and judged and frankly, I didn't need help to feel like a failure. I was doing pretty good at feeling that way all on my own.


When your friend or family member is out of work, it's only natural to want to help them out. The problem is that most of us honestly just don't know what to do or say in order to be helpful. We try to offer support by way of job search tips and suggestions, but that only serves to make the job seeker feel worse.


So, what can you do to show support? According to Psychology Today, the worst thing you can do is show pity. No one wants to feel that they are a victim or a failure.


A recent New York Times article suggested that the very best thing you can do to help an unemployed friend is to actually offer them your help. Here's a few suggestions from the article:

• See if your company is hiring and offer to hand in a resume for them.
• Offer a loan or a couch to sleep on (if you're comfortable doing so).  
• Offer to look at their resume or cover letters or provide a letter of recommendation.  
• Offer to babysit during a job interview.
• Don't exclude them from activities, but be sensitive about expenses when you go out. Pick activities that are free or very inexpensive.
• Offer encouragement-- a card, an e-mail or just a hug.
• Check in frequently, unemployed people are at high risk for depression.

What have you done to help an unemployed friend? Have you ever felt worse after talking a friend about your job situation? Please share your thoughts and suggestions in the comments.
 

By Melissa Kennedy- Melissa is a 9 year blog veteran and a freelance writer for HealthcareJobsiteBlog and Nexxt.. Along with helping others find the job of their dreams, she enjoys computer geekery, raising a teenager, supporting her local library, writing about herself in the third person and working on her next novel.