Four Ways to Remember Almost Anyone's Name

Almost all of us have had that moment wherein we run into someone we know, but can't remember their name. Most people try to avoid embarrassment by using different tricks to avoid having to actually say the person's name. There are plenty of these little “workarounds” or ways to not make the problem obvious like saying “Hey girl!” or “It's you!” rather than copping to having forgotten.

Let's face it, sometimes it just happens. Some people are better than others at remembering names, but for others, this is a situation they find themselves in on a regular basis. My boyfriend, for example, is terrible with names. Even with people he has known for a long time, he can draw a blank. His boss, women he used to date, neighbors and even members of his extended family have all been called by the wrong name. (Honestly, I'm surprised that he remembers my name.) It frustrates him terribly because he knows that when you forget someone's name or call them by the wrong name, it makes them feel unimportant or insignificant. The problem isn't that he doesn't value them or that he doesn't care enough to remember, he is just bad at names.

On the other hand, calling someone by their name really makes them feel important and valued. Shakespeare may have wondered if a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but calling your co-worker “Julie” when her name is “Rose” certainly doesn't make her feel as good.

If you, like so many others, struggle to remember names, here are four tricks you can use to help remember almost anyone's name:

Be present in your conversation. When you meet someone, be interested and engaged in the conversation. All too often, our attention is focused on making a good impression, wondering if we look good and waiting for our turn to talk. Try to oust these thoughts from your mind and ask questions to find out more about the person you're talking to. When you're actually interested, the conversation, the person, and their name become more memorable.

Repeat, repeat. When someone introduces themselves to you, always repeat their name back to them at least twice. It takes a bit of practice, but it goes something like this: “Hi, it's nice to meet you. My name's Mary.” “Mary? That's such a nice name. It's great to meet you too, Mary.” The great thing about this technique is that not only will it be easier to attach the name to the face, you get the opportunity to be sure that you are pronouncing their name correctly.

Focus on what makes them different. I'm generally pretty good with names. But I get confused when I meet someone who reminds me of someone else. Once, I worked with a woman named Jill, which isn't a complicated name. I had a horrible time remembering her name because she reminded me so much of someone I know whose name was Anna. For whatever reason, whenever I thought about Jill, in my mind I would call her Anna. I hadn't confused the two people; I just re-named her. What finally helped was talking with Jill and getting to know her better. I focused particularly on the ways that she was not at all like my friend Anna.

End conversations with their name. Everyone likes to be called by their name. It makes them feel good, and what's more, it makes them like the speaker just a little more. At the end of every conversation, make it a habit to say their name. Not only is it good manners, but it gives you one more chance to engrave the name into your memory.

Remembering names, especially at networking events or meetings can be tricky. Hopefully, these four tips will help you put the right name to the right face and avoid those awkward moments when you come face to face with “what's-his-name.”

Do you have trouble with names? What do you do to remember? Please share your thoughts in the comments.

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