The most common misconceptions about introverts.
By now, I'm sure you know how important networking is when you are trying to advance your career or find a new job. The problem is, when I think about people who are really good at networking, I always picture a man that smiles a lot and shakes hands with an impressive imitation of actual caring. For example, the stereotypical door to door salesmen. These people are ones who are naturally outgoing and for them, networking is just second nature. As an introvert, just the idea of attending a networking function makes me break out into a cold sweat.
While I can admire and appreciate the people skills that come naturally to some, I think it is important to remember that anyone can successfully network with others and market themselves effectively. They secret is to really understand who you are and how you best interact with others. Many of us are extroverts, which means that we enjoy making small talk and feel energized when we spend time in groups. Others of us are introverts, which means that meeting new people can be draining and a little bit intimidating. When faced with situations where chit chat is required, introverts can feel in over their head.
With this large of a difference between the two personality types, there are many misconceptions about why some people are less outgoing than others. Being an introvert doesn't have to be a social disability; in fact, introverts typically make very strong connections with others.
Here are 5 common misconceptions about introverts:
- Introverts dislike talking – This couldn't be farther from the truth. Personally, I love to talk. Most introverts just don't talk unless they feel that they have something to say. If I am talking to someone who shares some of my interests, I can talk for hours. If this sounds like you, before your next networking event, try gathering information about topics you think most of the attendees will be interested in. This way you will feel more confident about having something of value to add to a conversation.
- “Introvert” is just another word for shy – Introverts aren't afraid of talking and they aren't afraid of people. Although some introverts may also be shy, shyness is a different thing entirely. Because quiet people are often mistaken for being shy, they are less frequently approached by others. If you want to get to know someone you think is an introvert, just start talking to them. They will be grateful that you initiated the contact.
- Introverts are anti-social – Actually, introverts are extremely loyal friends. Rather than having a large circle of acquaintances, they typically have just a few very close friends. In general, if you manage to become friends with an introvert, you will find that you have a loyal ally for life. Even though introverts enjoy time alone, they can get very lonely and they want sincere connections with their friends.
- Introverts think they are better than everyone else – Anyone can be an egotist, no matter what their personality type. Introverts spend more time inside their heads; thinking, daydreaming and so on. Added to that, they are typically individualists that don't like to follow the crowd.They don't give much thought to what other people are doing, so they frequently challenge the norm and can give the impression of thinking that they are better than others. If you are an introvert, you can appear more pleasant if you remember to smile and give regular listening feedback when you are getting to know someone new.
- With some self confidence and coaching, introverts can learn to be extroverts – This isn't a personality flaw that can be “fixed”. Many studies have shown that introverts and extroverts have different brain functions. Introverts are more sensitive to Dopamine, which may be why they are more comfortable in small groups. Too much noise and activity can over-stimulate their brains, causing them to withdraw.Introverts don't lack confidence and it isn't a problem that needs a solution. This personality difference is just one of the ways that humans differ from one another. In addition, there have even been studies that suggest that the higher a person's IQ is, the more likely it is that they will be an introvert.
By understanding your personality type, you can determine what types of networking and self promoting are going to be best for you. If you are in the minority and are an introvert, don't avoid opportunities to meet new professional contacts. Instead, look for ways that you can maximize your unique social abilities without getting overwhelmed. Seek out small gatherings and promote yourself as someone who cares about building relationships, not just adding contacts.
Are you an Extrovert? Do you enjoy networking? If you are an introvert, what do you do to make networking easier? I would love to hear your thoughts and suggestions in the comments.
By Melissa Kennedy- Melissa is a 9 year blog veteran and a freelance writer for ManhattanJobsBlog. Along with helping others find the job of their dreams, she enjoys computer geekery, raising a teenager, supporting her local library, writing about herself in the third person and working on her next novel.
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