3 Strategies for Managing Office Discrepancies Professionally

John Krautzel
Posted by in Career Advice


Office conflicts do not have to ruin productivity, cause someone to quit or get out of hand. Managers and supervisors should develop strategies to deal with any types of disagreements and arguments that occur at the workplace. The main thing to remember is emotions can reach a discordant tipping point that causes some heated debates, and conflict resolution should get to the basic cause of the disagreement. A few simple strategies can go a long way to managing disputes.

1. Initiate Difficult Conversations

Talking to angry, fearful and emotional people can be tricky as you balance the need to give out correct information versus alleviating people's concerns. Unfortunately, this is where a difficult conversation comes into play. Speaking to co-workers is not the hard part, it is the subject matter of the conversation that makes it difficult.

Ask what happened to start the discord in the first place. This is the only way you can get to the bottom of it. Ask each party involved in the disagreement to give his side of the story. Take notes if necessary to refer to later.

Talk about the feelings behind each person's side of the story. Actively listen to that person and summarize what you heard. This way, the person talking to you acknowledges that what you perceive is correct. Once you get everyone's feelings about a situation, you can assess how to alleviate the anger.

Finally, identify what makes the people upset with respect to the discord. One person might feel fear or insecure regarding his work ethic. Another employee may feel threatened by a new person who has a lot of talent. A good manager props everyone up and accentuates the positives to make employees feel useful and valued. Difficult conversations allow mediators to assess the situation as accurately as possible.

2. Listen, Listen, Listen

Emotions may cloud the judgment of employees during a conflict, so mediators, bosses and supervisors must learn to take anger out of the situation as much as possible. Removing anger starts with listening. Attentively hear every side of a story and give a summarized version back to the person. Move on to the next employee and hear his concerns.

Once you listen to every side of the story, you can start to find solutions to the problem by asking questions. Where did any intense emotions start? When did the discord escalate? Why did each person act the way he did? Asking questions gets people talking to you so you can listen even more, plus it shows everyone you care and are engaged in the conversation.

Listening lets everyone try to understand another person's point of view. Once you have a new perspective, you might gain insight as to how to manage the conflict. Sometimes, you need to get those involved to come to the table to move things toward a resolution.

3. Have a Staff Meeting

Literally put everything on the table when you have a staff meeting to address the disagreement. Seeing everyone together lets all parties listen to each side of the story. Each person should have uninterrupted speaking time to lay out his concerns.

Suggest a neutral site to hold the meeting, such as a local restaurant, to discuss things away from the office. This might reduce the stress, tension and pressure of the situation. A neutral site may also get people to open up a bit more as they talk about their feelings.

As a mediator, you must remain impartial to all sides at the meeting as you work out a solution that benefits everyone. Once you propose your ideas, make sure everyone agrees and that the conflict is actually over. You might even take a vote at the meeting to ascertain each person's feelings. The sooner you handle the disagreement, the sooner the business gets back to making money.

Managing conflict starts with policies in human resources. A written policy gives everyone a framework to start resolving disagreements in a specific way. Supervisors can then tap into their own managing style to keep discord from ruining a company's bottom line.

Photo Courtesy of The White House at Flickr.com

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  • Jane H.
    Jane H.

    I'm always thinking about what can be learned from a situation. I once worked at a company where I was clearly the superior of my supervisor at the time in terms of the work we were doing, but I gave him the respect that was his due for the position he held. In return, he showed me some valuable methods he used for defusing tense situations that I used with other employees after I rose above him in the company.

  • Nancy Anderson
    Nancy Anderson

    Thanks for the comments. I would think that most companies - at least the larger ones - would provide conflict resolution training at least once a year. The guidelines for conflict resolution should be included in the employee handbook if the company is large enough to do that. If the company is smaller, then conflict resolution will probably be easier to deal with and resolve with or without written guidelines.

  • Emma Rochekins
    Emma Rochekins

    Just like annual sexual harassment training is mandatory for supervisors (in some states, anyway), perhaps conflict resolution training also should be required, for managers as well as non-management staff. Before conflict resolution occurs, though, there is conflict itself. Wouldn't it make sense to also stress the importance of conflict de-escalation skills?

  • Erica  T.
    Erica T.

    I think all workplaces should provide a written conflict resolution policy for employees because some managers are just better at working through conflicts than others. A well-written, detailed conflict policy should provide all managers with instructions/tips to handle various kinds of conflicts and disagreements. This policy should also provide employees with instructions/protocol about how to voice complaints and concerns about conflicts brewing in the workplace before these conflicts get out of hand.

  • Duncan  Maranga
    Duncan Maranga

    Doing more and more of listening while resolving the conflict is, to me, a very noble strategy. There is always a tendency of the conflicting parties to raise their voices through the process. Each of them wants you to see how badly they have been hurt by the issue, so you need to carefully listen to hear even the unspoken communication. I also like the idea of rephrasing their statements so that you are sure that you heard the right things.

  • Shannon Philpott
    Shannon Philpott

    I don't necessarily agree with airing disagreements during a staff meeting unless it involves all employees. I have found that many times, this practice can damage the overall morale of the team and usually, the involved parties do not see themselves as the culprits in the disagreement. Handling it personally is always the best approach in my opinion.

  • Nancy Anderson
    Nancy Anderson

    @Mike thanks for your comment. In my experience, I have found that pairing them up works wonders. It's amazing to watch what happens when you sit both parties down and have an honest talk with them. Let them know what you expect and that the project can only be completed by them working together to achieve the results. Maybe it sounds counter intuitive but I have found that they will either put their differences aside and work on the project - both for the good of the company as well as their future with the company. I have seen great friendships forged this way. Sure the first couple days might be a bit rough but they will work it out. Or, if they can't, one of them will ultimately resign. So don't be afraid to throw them into the lion's den. To me, we are adults and we need to act like it. If you can't act like one, then you don't need to be on the team or in the position. Anyone else have experience here?

  • Mike Van de Water
    Mike Van de Water

    These are great suggestions for how to gain control over an emotional situation, but what are some ideas for ways to actually resolve the problems? Obviously each situation is unique, but have you found that some resolutions (separating coworkers/scheduling changes) have an increased chance of success? As a manager it is often difficult to find a compromise that everybody's happy with.

  • CATHERINE S.
    CATHERINE S.

    I appreciate your suggestion of listening carefully and then summarizing what you heard about the conflict. This is important because it gives people the opportunity to correct any misunderstandings or things that are unclear. It also demonstrates to workers that their supervisor really does care and is actively trying to get to the truth of the situation so that they are able to resolve it.

  • Nancy Anderson
    Nancy Anderson

    Thanks for the comments. @Shaday so very true that it's important for a manager to know what is going on within his/her team and to take appropriate action prior to the situation getting out of hand. If there is bullying, then it needs to be handled right then and there instead of letting it seep into the entire team. @Jay conflict resolution is really tough no matter how much training you may have had. Even worse is when the conflict cannot be resolved without one or more members being removed from the team - and possibly from the company. @William I am sure that every manager will have his own style of handling this. Personally I think that berating an employee in public is bad form from a bad manager. Praising in public is great. But, if there is an issue, discuss it individually with each member - even if it means having individual meetings with the team members. The manager is going to get an earful from each member I am sure but at least it will allow him to make an informed decision. Discussing an issue openly within a team environment could bring on disastrous results. How does everyone else feel about this subject?

  • William Browning
    William Browning

    What do you do if the staff meeting doesn't work? Those types of settings are appropriate if the conflict goes beyond just one or two people and the entire team feels the effects of a disagreement. However, one-on-one conversations may let you deal with the situation more discreetly. What's the best way to go?

  • Jay Bowyer
    Jay Bowyer

    I honestly think that the ability to positively resolve office-based conflicts is a rare and beautiful thing in any manager. That type of negotiation prowess doesn't come naturally to many people, and I believe it's one of the best skills to cultivate. Decent conflict resolution training courses are solid gold, because good conflict resolution skills make it much easier to climb the corporate ladder.

  • Shaday Stewart
    Shaday Stewart

    @Lydia, I agree that staff meetings shouldn't be necessary to resolve individual conflicts, as it invites people to take sides in a situation they weren't personally involved in. Managers should try to keep conflicts isolated to prevent others from chiming in with unrelated complaints that simply escalate the issue and polarize the office.

    @Abbey, To add to other posters' insights, it also important for managers to step in when the conflict involves bullying or a violation of employee rights. Hopefully, most conflicts won't get this bad before management steps in, but sometimes, work cliques lead to a bullying situation . For example, I have seen teammates gang up on the odd man out, ignoring one person's ideas and always forcing them to accept whatever decisions the rest of the group makes. It prevents that person from growing at work and making valuable contributions. In such cases, office-wide meetings may be necessary by company policy to educate all employees on how to handle conflicts.

  • Lydia K.
    Lydia K.

    I don't think entire departments or teams need to be in on meetings to resolve a conflict. This seems counterproductive and could actually give rise to further disagreements. I think the parties involved should talk things out with the manager as a mediator. If possible, a neutral third party might also play a useful role in the meeting.

  • Nancy Anderson
    Nancy Anderson

    @Abbey thanks for your comment. I have never worked at any place that was 100% conflict free. As long as we are individuals, there will be conflict. But I do agree that, if we are old enough to have the job, we are old enough to be able to resolve any differences that we might have or at least put them on the shelf during working hours. When should a manager jump in? When the work is not getting done. When he can see that maybe the other workers are taking sides leading to a huge conflict. When other workers come to the manager with complaints about two or more individuals who cannot get along. So anytime that it impedes good order and discipline is when the manager should step in. That's been my experience. Anyone else have an experience in this?

  • Abbey Boyd
    Abbey Boyd

    I like the ideas outlined in this article, but I have to wonder when a manager should actually step in. I imagine that no workplace is free of conflict 100% of the time, but as grown adults, when should the employees be expected to work it out on their own? What are some signs that a manager should step into a conflict and take action?

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